From My Side of the Picket Sign

Posted on Posted in Anencephaly, Neural Tube Defects, Opinion, Stories

By Carissa Waldner I see you day after day holding up the sign that continually haunts me, “Babies killed here.” I watch as your supporters show up on the weekends and stand with you, holding pictures of fetuses, showcasing the number of days and hours it takes for a human heart to start beating. Your eyes are cold and judgmental. They pierce through me as I drive by. I avert mine day after day, knowing how you’d feel if you knew my story. Every morning I drive past you with two children in the backseat of my minivan. I spend my days making lunches, driving […]

Mariana

Posted on Posted in Fetal Hydrops, Induction/L&D, Stories, Trisomy 21 (Down syndrome)

By Andrea My husband and I were excited when we found out that I was pregnant. We have a three-year-old daughter and this baby would have been born around the same time our daughter started kindergarten. Everything happened as planned; it was a very expected pregnancy. The first ultrasound was at 12 weeks. I wasn’t very concerned. It was probably because we didn’t have any problems during our first pregnancy and our daughter was born healthy. Even though my husband really wanted to be there, he couldn’t make it for that ultrasound. Maybe that wasn’t such a bad thing. I completely broke down when I […]

The Hardest and Easiest Decision

Posted on Posted in Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome, Stories, Trisomy 18 (Edward's syndrome)

By Ava’s Mom Today my mom called me about my cousin and his wife who are expecting their first baby. We are very happy for them. Their baby is breech, so they’ve  scheduled a c-section which will take place on my second child’s due date. It hit me that I should be planning a first birthday party. It also hit me that for my cousin’s wife, the worst thing happening is she can’t have the vaginal birth she wanted. I have had three children vaginally, but only two are living. My first pregnancy—a chemical pregnancy—ended before it really began.  I didn’t think of it as […]

Acceptance

Posted on Posted in Religious Perspectives, Skeletal Dysplasia, Stories

by T.T. In a week, we will be marking one year since we said goodbye, and I wanted to reflect upon it all. It took nearly nine months for me to even start to come to terms with what happened to our family in the last year, and the decisions we made. It led to a new phase of tears, but it felt somewhat different than in the early days. For a long time, I struggled to even allow myself to grieve the loss of our sweet baby, Daniel, because of the massive guilt I felt. Though raised Catholic, I’m totally liberal in ways that […]

Ethan’s Story

Posted on Posted in Congenital Heart Defects, D&E, Religious Perspectives, Stories, Trisomy 21 (Down syndrome)

By C.J. This is Ethan’s story–my youngest son. It started out much like I thought for a third pregnancy. I have two healthy children, a girl, age five, and a boy, age three. I was sick with morning/all day sickness. When you are that sick and you have been through it twice before, it is hard to be too excited, but my husband and children were over the moon about the new baby. My son kept looking at my stomach and saying “is it getting bigger?” While my daughter began kissing my growing belly and writing “I love you” cards for her new sibling. My […]

Hope Crushed

Posted on Posted in Stories, Trisomy 21 (Down syndrome)

By J.G. After having a miscarriage at eight weeks this year, I found out I was pregnant again at around six weeks. I was excited and nervous to be pregnant so soon after miscarrying. I made it past the eight weeks scary zone and I had my first appointment with the genetics counselor at 12 weeks to determine any risks associated with my pregnancy. We opted to do an ultrasound and the new cell-free fetal DNA (Panorama) testing. The ultrasound looked wonderful and showed no soft markers for any kind of birth defects. I was excited that everything looked good and I was almost on […]

Our Baby Boy

Posted on Posted in D&E, Stories, Trisomy 21 (Down syndrome)

By J.D. I have polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS), so when my husband and I decided to try getting pregnant earlier this year, we had a difficult time finding that “window” due to my irregular cycles. We were referred to a fertility office where we started months of testing to narrow down the issue and come up with a plan. My husband tested fine and it was determined that I had plenty of eggs, they just weren’t ovulating themselves. We would do ovulation induction with medications and timed intercourse. Our first cycle worked! I couldn’t believe it. I stared at the stick in pure disbelief then […]

Will You Let Her Go?

Posted on Posted in D&E, Stories, Trisomy 18 (Edward's syndrome)

By Vanessa Spiritoso When I was pregnant with baby number three, I wasn’t excited but I wasn’t unhappy. My mind was preoccupied with running after my two boys who are under the age of five. I really didn’t have time to focus on baby number three. Some days I felt pregnant, but most days I did not. I remember telling my family that I knew I was pregnant but it didn’t feel like it. I even remember talking to my baby asking, “Are you in there?” because I didn’t feel like I felt when I was pregnant with the boys. I didn’t have that aggressive […]

Chloe Fay

Posted on Posted in Hydrocephalus, Induction/L&D, Neural Tube Defects, Spina Bifida, Stories

By Zena Mason To the newly bereaved parent: please know that you’re not alone. I want to share my story of medical termination in Australia. This was extremely hard to write and share. In a world full of supportive people we have certainly felt alone because it’s so taboo and people are scared to talk about anything to do with the loss of a child. Unfortunately, we live in a world where we as humans are judged for what shoes we wear, what house we live in and whether we like boys or girls, so when we had to make a heart-wrenching choice it became apparent […]