VACTERL

I Chose Peace

Posted on Posted in Stories, VACTERL

By reading this story I hope you find comfort in knowing you aren’t alone. I hope some of the strategies I used to cope will give you a beneficial perspective. by Nicole C. I was five months pregnant with our second son. My first pregnancy was normal and I was just trying to survive through this one to “complete our family” as my husband put it. Little did I realize how much I was taking for granted. During our routine 20-week ultrasound, my OBGYN found a slight umbilical cord issue. It took me three weeks to get in for my routine Level II ultrasound that […]

avoid anti-choice zealots

Q & A: How can I avoid Pro-Life OBs?

Posted on Posted in Practical Information, Q&A

QUESTION: Going into a subsequent pregnancy after termination for fetal anomaly, I find I’m really concerned about the politics of my health care providers. How can I tell if an obstetrician (OB), maternal-fetal medicine (MFM) specialist or other health care provider is a “pro-life” anti-choice zealot who won’t support my decisions about my body, my baby and my family? ANSWER: This is a great question and an important one. I actually had (unbeknownst to me at the time) a pro-life MFM. He deliberately delayed telling me my amnio results in an attempt to push me past my state’s abortion deadline. Fortunately, my regular (pro-choice) OB stepped […]

Q & A: Is this an appropriate question?

Posted on Posted in Opinion, Q&A

Just look at these bees, minding their own beeswax. Have a question for Ending a Wanted Pregnancy? Email us. QUESTION I appreciate the honesty of Kate C. I just read a piece of her writings from 2015. I’m wondering if mothers who choose abortion for a wanted pregnancy ever request testing on their baby’s bodies to confirm the diagnoses doctors give during pregnancy? And maybe why Kate C didn’t. Her article invited questions, so I’m hoping this is still appropriate. Thank you. Cheryl T.   ANSWER Hi Cheryl T. Occasionally, parents do request testing following an abortion for medical reasons. However, asking Kate C. why she […]

Think about it.

Think About It

Posted on Posted in Opinion, Stories

by Margot Finn Do you know what it is like to live in the same house as a room that you intended for a baby who died? God help you if you’ve already set up a crib and changing table. Do you disassemble them yourself in a sobbing rage late one night, thinking about all the times people told you chipperly to “get sleep now while you can!”? Or do you hack them to bits and burn them some bleak February day when you would have been massively pregnant, about to go into labor any day now, in the alternate timeline where your baby wasn’t […]

MTHFR gene - Read about why many medical associations (ACMG, ACOG, AAFP) are recommending not testing for this gene

MTHFR Common Polymorphisms

Posted on Posted in Articles, Opinion

Editor’s note: The topic of the MTHFR gene crops up every now and then in our private support group. A medical professional who happens to also be a member of our group was concerned about unfounded fears raised by common misunderstandings about this gene. She wrote the following to clarify the facts about this gene and hopefully ease concerns.   By Jenn  The MTHFR gene that has some very common changes within it (so common that 50% of us carry 1 or 2 changes within this gene).  When this gene was first discovered it was thought to be associated with many health concerns including blood clots, […]

Severe spina bifida - Daddy's shoes - "Our gender reveal party was canceled because of the news of severe spina bifida that we got from the specialist. The crushing feeling still haunts me."

Daddy’s Shoes

Posted on Posted in Neural Tube Defects, Spina Bifida

We called several specialists around the country and Dana spent an entire day on the phone with the four big players in the fetal surgery specialty. In some cases, they can do surgery on the baby while still in-utero. All the specialists looked at our case of severe spina bifida and gave our son bleak prognoses.

What nobody tells you - Another 8 long days later, as I was getting ready for our appointment with the fetal cardiologist, our genetic counselor called with the amnio result. It had come back with a diagnosis of something called Mosaic Trisomy 13.

What Nobody Tells You

Posted on Posted in Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome, Trisomy 13 (Patau syndrome)

Prenatal Diagnosis: Mosiac Trisomy 13 and HLHS Nobody tells you when you’re trying to get pregnant that things can go wrong and it could end badly. By Gina McGarey I didn’t want kids until I was in my 30s. This past summer we started trying. Fast forward about 4 months and we found out I was pregnant. We were both super excited and planned all of these different ways to tell our parents, siblings, and friends (I have some amazing videos of us telling most of them). This would be the first grandchild for all of our parents and the first great-grandchild for half of […]

From my side of the picket link - " Anencephaly was the word the doctor handed to me, scribbled on the back of Avery’s freshly printed ultrasound photo. 200% accurate diagnosis is what he stated when I pleaded with him to double check. "

From My Side of the Picket Sign

Posted on Posted in Anencephaly, Neural Tube Defects, Opinion, Stories

I will never succumb to feeling guilty or selfish for the most selfless decision I’ve ever made. By Carissa Waldner I see you day after day holding up the sign that continually haunts me, “Babies killed here.” I watch as your supporters show up on the weekends and stand with you, holding pictures of fetuses, showcasing the number of days and hours it takes for a human heart to start beating. Your eyes are cold and judgmental. They pierce through me as I drive by. I avert mine day after day, knowing how you’d feel if you knew my story. Every morning I drive past […]

Mariana - Terminating after hydrops, cystic hygroma, and T21 diagnosis (Down Syndrome)

Mariana

Posted on Posted in Fetal Hydrops, Induction/L&D, Stories, Trisomy 21 (Down syndrome)

It was almost like she came out in her bubble, protected from the outside world. By Andrea My husband and I were excited when we found out that I was pregnant. We have a three-year-old daughter and this baby would have been born around the same time our daughter started kindergarten. Everything happened as planned; it was a very expected pregnancy. The first ultrasound was at 12 weeks. I wasn’t very concerned. It was probably because we didn’t have any problems during our first pregnancy and our daughter was born healthy. Even though my husband really wanted to be there, he couldn’t make it for […]

Trisomy 18 - At 23 weeks pregnant, we said goodbye to Ava.

The Hardest and Easiest Decision

Posted on Posted in Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome, Stories, Trisomy 18 (Edward's syndrome)

I felt that if I carried her to term it would be for my benefit, not hers. By Ava’s Mom Today my mom called me about my cousin and his wife who are expecting their first baby. We are very happy for them. Their baby is breech, so they’ve  scheduled a c-section which will take place on my second child’s due date. It hit me that I should be planning a first birthday party. It also hit me that for my cousin’s wife, the worst thing happening is she can’t have the vaginal birth she wanted. I have had three children vaginally, but only two […]