Q&A: Who The Hell Are You?

Posted on Posted in Opinion, Q&A

Have a question for Ending a Wanted Pregnancy? Email us. QUESTION Who The Hell Are You To Tell People Its Ok To End Life. You Are Not The LIVING GOD! and if you were to read the Bible You Would Know That. How Does Anyone Know If That Baby Was Born and Was A Miracle Baby??? Stop Trying To Out Do What God Has For Us… Doctors Don’t Always Know What Is Good For Us, Now Do They???? Pray as God Does Answer Our Prayers…He Always Has A Plan For US…. ANSWER That’s a complicated question so I’m going to break it down and answer […]

destigmatizing abortion

Destigmatizing Abortion

Posted on Posted in Opinion, Stories

By Grace O. Let’s talk about destigmatizing abortion. I’ll start by saying that wherever you are at right now with the word abortion, you are Ok and you are welcome here. Discomfort with the word—and the associated politics surrounding it—are not uncommon in this community, especially with our newcomers. But I think it’s time we sat down with an ice cold of pitcher of lemonade and talked it out. First things first: we are here to support you through your pregnancy loss regardless of your politics. We understand that emotionally, terminating a wanted pregnancy for medical reasons is very different from terminating an unwanted pregnancy. We’re probably all […]

Q&A: What About Miracles Though?

Posted on Posted in Opinion, Q&A

Have a question for Ending a Wanted Pregnancy? Email us. QUESTION I stumbled across your website while surfing the Internet.  Don’t you have a place for people who are living with their absolutely wonderful, awe-inspiring, children with various disabilities to add stories that might bring hope and challenge parents to make other decisions after receiving a prenatal diagnosis? Why aren’t you including stories about disabled kids who have miraculously defied all the odds? ANSWER The sole mission of this web site is to provide comfort and support to parents who have already made their decision to end a wanted pregnancy following a poor prenatal diagnosis or for […]

Q&A: But Aren’t I Morally Superior?

Posted on Posted in Anencephaly, Q&A, Stories

Have a question for Ending a Wanted Pregnancy? Email us. QUESTION During a routine ultrasound, my sister’s baby girl was diagnosed with a fatal birth defect called anencephaly. My sister, her husband and our whole family were devastated. She decided to continue her pregnancy, and five months later gave birth to her little girl. She was with us for four days. The impact she had on so many people, doctors,nurses, friends, and family will never be forgotten. Neither will the strength my sister and brother-in-law showed during those months of pregnancy. Thirty-one weeks into my own third pregnancy, my little boy was diagnosed with an extremely rare tumor. Three weeks later I […]

Choosing Compassion

Posted on Posted in Congenital Heart Defects, Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome, Induction/L&D, Stories, Trisomy 21 (Down syndrome)

By Grace O. A mother, who found out her unborn baby had Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome (HLHS), decided to carry him to full term. But she did not have him undergo the series of surgeries that might have saved his life. She said, “You must believe that the decisions you are making are the right ones for you, your baby, and your family; founded in love, they cannot be wrong.” Although my choice was different from hers, I agree with her statement. When it comes to parental decisions, and there is no one-size-fits-all correct choice. It is all too easy to judge another’s choice or […]

Cookie Cutter Grief Support

Posted on Posted in Articles, Opinion

By Grace O. We all feel exactly this. I was scooting around on the Internet the other day when I spotted this bit of well-intentioned but less-than-helpful advice in group for those who’ve aborted wanted pregnancies for medical reasons: “We all go through this grief. We all feel exactly the same way, each and every one of us, with the same progress and the same setbacks, and none of us ever get over it.” Oh really? If you’ve been subjected to this cookie cutter brand of “grief support,” I’m sorry. There is no identical process that we all go through. There are no specific feelings […]

Never Say Never

Posted on Posted in Opinion

by Grace O. It happens to most of us sooner or later. You reveal the details of your heartbreaking decision to a trusted friend, neighbor, coworker, family member and she responds with a soul crushing line like, “That’s not the decision I would have made!” or “I would love my baby no matter what!” or “But children with Down syndrome are beautiful and always so happy!” While we’re waiting for her to sprain her shoulder patting herself on the back for her imaginary moral superiority, let’s debunk those all too common “Well I’d never” statements. That’s not the decision I would have made! There is only one […]


Posted on 1 CommentPosted in Congenital Heart Defects, Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome, Trisomy 21 (Down syndrome)

Grace O. About nine months after making my heartwrenching choice to end my 20-week pregnancy due to a combination Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome and Down syndrome, I conceived again. That was a tough decision, one I had to make all over again each month that I did not get pregnant. Getting pregnant again is not a decision I would have made if abortion had not been legal. After what we’d been though, it was terrifying to even consider trying again. I now understood only too well that poor prenatal diagnosis wasn’t something that only happened to “other people.” The best prenatal behavior, medical care or […]

Cupid’s arrow

Posted on Posted in Articles, Congenital Heart Defects, Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome, Stories, Trisomy 21 (Down syndrome)

Grace O. Few things irritate me more than people griping about how much they hate Valentine’s Day. “It’s just a Hallmark holiday,” they whine, “Why can’t people say I love you every day instead of waiting for Valentine’s Day? I hate chocolates. I never have a date. Roses are a waste of money. It’s stupid.” These petty complaints crop up every year. And I have to stuff my response, resist the temptation to stun the complainers out of their self-absorbed grousing about how tough it is for them to tolerate another Valentine’s Day. So I let them sulk about romance, or polish their tiresome hipster cred […]