Q&A: How Do I Comfort Them?

Posted on Posted in Q&A, Trisomy 21 (Down syndrome), Twin-toTwin Transfusion Syndrome (TTTS)

Have a question for Ending a Wanted Pregnancy? Email us. QUESTION I’m not sure if you can help me but, at this stage, I’m open to anything. My brother and his girlfriend, who is 40, were expecting twins. After discovering that they were monochorionic twins, Twin-to-Twin Transfusion Syndrome (TTTS) was diagnosed. Based on a decision to aggressively treat the TTTS, they were advised to undergo prenatal screening before embarking on any treatment program. Today, the FISH results of their CVS have indicated Trisomy 21 in 80% of the cells resulting in a diagnosis of Mosaic Down Syndrome. On top of this, the one baby has indications […]

Q&A: Will I Ever Recover from the Guilt?

Posted on Posted in Q&A, Stories, Trisomy 21 (Down syndrome)

Have a question for Ending a Wanted Pregnancy? Email us. QUESTION I just had an amnio. I am only 16 weeks along. They had a tough time seeing a lot with the level 2 ultrasound but did say the baby is missing the third bones on the pinky fingers, which is a soft marker for Down syndrome. We chose to have the amnio so we could terminate the pregnancy if there was a problem. Now we’re facing the very real possibility of having to make a very tough decision in the next week or so. We are devastated. I feel upset and guilty. I feel like a terrible person […]

Q&A: How Did You Cope?

Posted on Posted in Articles, Q&A

Have a question for Ending a Wanted Pregnancy? Email us. QUESTION What helped you to cope in the aftermath of ending your wanted pregnancy? How did you cope physically and emotionally? What got you through those first few days and weeks? What do you wish you had known at the time? ANSWERS All answers are from members of our private support group. There are a two mottoes that helped me: “I took the pain so my baby wouldn’t have to feel it” and “I will hold her in my heart if not in my hands.” From that starting off point I did a few things: 1. […]

Q&A: How Do You Feel About the Word Abortion?

Posted on Posted in Articles, Opinion, Q&A

Have a question for Ending a Wanted Pregnancy? Email us. QUESTION We asked our web site and support group administrators “How do you feel about the word ‘abortion’? How have your feelings about the word changed in the years since you had yours?” ANSWERS For me even after hearing my doctor say abortion, I still didn’t want to believe it. I was a sucky pro-choice person back then. I thought abortion was reserved for other people, not me, the happily married woman. But I always said I never knew what I would do if my birth control pills had failed before marriage. I remember recoiling when my […]

Q&A: What About Miracles Though?

Posted on Posted in Opinion, Q&A

Have a question for Ending a Wanted Pregnancy? Email us. QUESTION I stumbled across your website while surfing the Internet.  Don’t you have a place for people who are living with their absolutely wonderful, awe-inspiring, children with various disabilities to add stories that might bring hope and challenge parents to make other decisions after receiving a prenatal diagnosis? Why aren’t you including stories about disabled kids who have miraculously defied all the odds? ANSWER The sole mission of this web site is to provide comfort and support to parents who have already made their decision to end a wanted pregnancy following a poor prenatal diagnosis or for […]

Q&A: How Did You Handle the Financial Burden?

Posted on Posted in D&C, D&E, Induction/L&D, Practical Information, Q&A

Have a question for Ending a Wanted Pregnancy? Email us. QUESTION How did you handle the financial burdens associated with ending your wanted pregnancy? These might include any medical expenses, travel expenses if you had to travel to obtain your procedure, cremation, funeral and related costs, and counseling services or mental health therapy. ANSWERS California—Thankfully, my health insurance covered all of it. I am lucky to live in California. Michigan—My parents helped us. I was a SAHM at the time and we were getting by on my husband’s teacher’s salary. Because he is a state employee, our health insurance wouldn’t touch abortion for any reason. We didn’ […]

Q&A: Can I Choose the Termination Procedure I Want?

Posted on Posted in D&E, Hydrocephalus, Induction/L&D, Neural Tube Defects, Practical Information, Q&A, Spina Bifida, Stories

Have a question for Ending a Wanted Pregnancy? Email us. QUESTION My unborn child has been diagnosed with severe spina bifida with hydrocephalus at week 19 gestation. My husband and I have decided to terminate the pregnancy. The  D&E seems cruel to me. I would like to have early induction and delivery abortion (L&D) but I don’t think they will offer it to me. I think that I would cope and grieve more effectively with this termination method. I want to see my child and say goodbye. Do you have any suggestions?   ANSWER I am very sorry that you are having to go through […]

Q&A: But Aren’t I Morally Superior?

Posted on Posted in Anencephaly, Q&A, Stories

Have a question for Ending a Wanted Pregnancy? Email us. QUESTION During a routine ultrasound, my sister’s baby girl was diagnosed with a fatal birth defect called anencephaly. My sister, her husband and our whole family were devastated. She decided to continue her pregnancy, and five months later gave birth to her little girl. She was with us for four days. The impact she had on so many people, doctors,nurses, friends, and family will never be forgotten. Neither will the strength my sister and brother-in-law showed during those months of pregnancy. Thirty-one weeks into my own third pregnancy, my little boy was diagnosed with an extremely rare tumor. Three weeks later I […]

Q&A: Are My Amnio Results Accurate?

Posted on Posted in Practical Information, Q&A, Stories, Trisomy 21 (Down syndrome)

Have a question for Ending a Wanted Pregnancy? Email us. QUESTION We just received our amnio results and were given the unexpected news that our baby girl is positive with Trisomy 21. I have heard so many stories that others were prenatally diagnosed with a Down syndrome baby, and when they went full-term with the pregnancy their baby was fine. I want to be sure there were no mistakes in the lab. Am I just being paranoid?” ANSWER I’m really sorry that you’ve received a prenatal diagnosis of Trisomy 21. Unfortunately, the happy-ending stories we hear about “wrong” prenatal test results are typically based people not understanding the difference between a […]

Q&A: How Do I Decide?

Posted on Posted in Q&A

Have a question for Ending a Wanted Pregnancy? Email us. QUESTION My daughter has been prenatally diagnosed with a chromosome deletion (4p 15.2 16, possible Wolf-Hirschhorn Syndrome) and we’re having to decide now what to do. I’m 19 weeks pregnant. How do I decide? Any resources you can recommend would be very appreciated. ANSWER We are so sorry you are going through this. It is not clear from your note if you are still deciding whether or not to continue your pregnancy. We are not experts on any particular diagnosis, and would be reluctant to weigh in on such a personal decision even if we were. You can […]