Q&A: How Long Did You Wait Before Trying Again?

Posted on Posted in Stories

Have a question for Ending a Wanted Pregnancy? Email us. QUESTION How soon after losing your baby did you wait before trying to conceive again? ANSWERS I started trying after three months, but I didn’t get pregnant again until nine months after my loss. Every month that I didn’t get pregnant, I had to make the decision to try again all over again. My wife and I are just shy of two months out and are working our way up to starting a new IVF cycle. For us there are obviously a lot more steps involved, so in reality I won’t be pregnant until June at the earliest, […]

Q&A: How Did You Cope?

Posted on Posted in Articles, Q&A

Have a question for Ending a Wanted Pregnancy? Email us. QUESTION What helped you to cope in the aftermath of ending your wanted pregnancy? How did you cope physically and emotionally? What got you through those first few days and weeks? What do you wish you had known at the time? ANSWERS All answers are from members of our private support group. There are a two mottoes that helped me: “I took the pain so my baby wouldn’t have to feel it” and “I will hold her in my heart if not in my hands.” From that starting off point I did a few things: 1. […]

Light at the End of the Tunnel

Posted on Posted in Trisomy 18 (Edward's syndrome)

Alexia and Landon’s Mother I lost my daughter Alexia to Trisomy 18. I was 27 weeks pregnant and it was the hardest thing I have ever been through in my life. I really thought I would never heal from this loss and in some aspects I haven’t. I still grieve for her. I still long to have seen her little face and held her in my arms, but God had another plan for me. God planned for me to have my son Landon James who I became pregnant with exactly six weeks after I lost Alexia. My pregnancy with him so soon after my loss was […]

My Pregnancy After Loss

Posted on Posted in Spina Bifida

By Gracie’s Mommy My Gracie was my first pregnancy. I had so many hopes, dreams, and wants all tied up in her. She was going to give my life meaning and bring my husband and I even closer than we had ever been before. She was going to make me a mother, something I didn’t know I wanted so deeply. The day we found out Gracie was not okay, all of my dreams for her and us came crashing down. I’ve never been so sorrowful in my life. Choosing to let her go without ever meeting her is a choice that I will carry with […]

Parachutes

Posted on Posted in Congenital Heart Defects, Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome, Trisomy 21 (Down syndrome)

Grace O. About nine months after making my heartwrenching choice to end my 20-week pregnancy due to a combination Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome and Down syndrome, I conceived again. That was a tough decision, one I had to make all over again each month that I did not get pregnant. Getting pregnant again is not a decision I would have made if abortion had not been legal. After what we’d been though, it was terrifying to even consider trying again. I now understood only too well that poor prenatal diagnosis wasn’t something that only happened to “other people.” The best prenatal behavior, medical care or […]

Just One

Posted on Posted in Thanatophoric Dysplasia

By Jennifer The decision to end my pregnancy in 2006 came two days after my now twelve year old daughter, Hannah’s, sixth birthday. She was excited for the arrival of her baby sister, Emily. At our 20-week ultrasound, which was performed a week late so that my husband could come to the appointment, we received the devastating news that our baby had “serious skeletal issues consistent with dwarfism.” A week later, the diagnosis of Thanatophoric Dysplasia (which literally means “death-bearing”), was confirmed by the perinatologist. Thanatophoric Dysplasia has a survival rate of zero, due to an obstructed formation of the lungs. In our case, pre-eclampsia […]

Life after the storm

Posted on Posted in Hydrocephalus, Multiple Losses, Stories, Ventriculomegaly

By Julie I was unlucky two times. In a row. I had to make a heartbreaking decision to end my son’s life at 21 weeks and terminate a much-wanted pregnancy because of the prognosis of a “best case scenario of the developmental quality of life of a two-month-old.” We were told it was a one in a million occurrence. Five months later, I found myself pregnant again. We were monitored closely: every other week at a perinatologist’s office. And then, week 17, they started to see the same abnormalities. Week 18, diagnosis confirmed. Week 19, second termination. At that point, I couldn’t imagine being happy again […]

Hope for the Newly Bereaved

Posted on Posted in Articles, Opinion

By Sara I am so sorry for your losses. You will get through and life will be good again. Please know that you can handle anything now. Not much could be worse than what we have all been through. I still think of my baby every day, but it doesn’t break my heart anymore. It just is, there, in the background. I have moved along, dealt with my loss and accepted it. My new outlook on life is a little less naïve, but stronger. I no longer expect that things will be okay, I accept that what will be will be, and I have the […]

Genetic Recurrence Risks

Posted on Posted in Articles, Practical Information

By Helga V. Toriello, Ph.D. While every expectant couple hopes their child will be healthy, approximately 3-4% of couples will have a a child with a serious birth defect or combination of birth defects, called a syndrome, and another 1-3% will have a child with cognitive disabilities. Since prenatal testing is now readily available to parents, many will learn of a serious or life threatening problem during the pregnancy. When a child is born with a genetic condition or one is found prenatally, a referral to a genetics counselor may be made to provide the family with information regarding the diagnosis, prognosis and recurrence risks. […]